At this point in proceedings, It seems obligatory to reflect back on the last twelve months and look forward to the next.
A time when hopes should allay fears, optimists can cross their fingers and those who might have erred have a chance of a fresh start.
“New year: new opportunities” it is often said, although 2019 was actually the time setting for Blade Runner and we all know how bleak that imagined world was. At times, especially this year, our own seems similarly disparate, so I spent part of the perineal period contemplating the success stories of 2018 and what didn’t go so well before anticipating what might happen in the near future, as so many are wont to do at this time.
First of all, let me say that some wonderful moments took place this year: those close to us celebrated weddings and new arrivals; kids came on leaps and bounds; special moments were enjoyed (making it to important places, meeting important people) and never to be forgotten.
However, some of it was – for myriad reasons – spent in dystopia…
The Road
In which we think about a dystopian time, with impending disaster; the man and the boy, for whom things are a bit grey and very few positives prevail…
Divergent
The country feels more divided than ever, not just politically
speaking but also in irrelevant debates over a colour of dress or what someone
is saying. Even in terms of identity, people can’t just be themselves; they
have to fit in and conform, be it their clothes or their gender / sexuality.
People – especially the press – make a big deal of it, and humour / compliments
can be quickly deemed racist whilst calling someone a stupid woman – she’s a
woman, she’s made some very uneducated decisions – causes such furore whilst
the scapegoating of imaginary-droid users deflects from the very real issues of
growing economic uncertainty, huge surges in homelessness and actual –
unreported – drones causing very real tragedies.
Brave New
World
It’s not all darkness and down-ness, though; there are still some revelations to be had. The year saw revolutionary culinary experiences, including investing in a restaurant – with more exciting events to come – and taste sensations which bring beauty and the sublime into the everyday.
Matched
TV series like Masterchef Professionals, Christmas University Challenge, Only Connect and Mastermind every night helped the transition into the winter time. Not that I watched every episode – we were expecting visitors from another planet any time soon – but amidst the marking and the impending glow, it was nice to have distractions which reminded you there was life elsewhere.
I’ll make it on at least one of them, one day.
The real televisual highlights of the year included the truly staggering end to series 3 of Gomorrah; the darkly funny The End of the F***ing World and the Black Mirror ‘Bandersnatch’ episode, harking back to things like Dungeons and Dragons and a series of books I used to love – Choose your Own Adventure – one of which was called ‘An Invitation to Murder’ set in a ski resort; clearly contrived but so exciting for a ten year old me. BM is the opposite: each episode covers the dark side of technology, and seems to predict what actually comes true, so maybe interactivity is actually the future.
1984
Ready Player One had similar themes, and I actually read the novel before watching the film. They did a pretty good job of it. The same with Wonder, the book which arguably changed my life this year – high praise indeed, you’re thinking – but it certainly inspired and re-invigorated my and my day jobs. It’s been amazing spreading the power of reading and seeing the ripples emanate across my sphere of influence from four day-long courses. I read more books this year than I have in the last ten years, certainly, and rediscovered a love of literature which I know will last forever. I also got to meet and converse with the wonderful Frank Cottrell Boyce, which I’ll never forget.
Other highlights of film and fiction: Cobra Kai (which helped me through a difficult time in my life) then Isle of Dogs; Damien Hirst’s Netflix faux-umentary; Roma; SOLO; ‘The Monsters We Deserve’ by the brilliant Marcus Sedgwick; ‘One’ by Sarah Crossan and several other (largely YA) books, in particular – somewhat appropriately – ‘Where The World Ends’ by Geraldine McCaughrean.
Of course, I also loved watching the World Cup which gave the country a feelgood factor rarely before seen in my lifetime; it even influenced the girl’s school fair, and an overly competitive dads’ football tournament in which I was proud to be the inaugural scorer for her class. Talking of football, at times, even Everton were good to watch, and I was starting to think about the last time we were on the cusp of something really good, with a young manager and a team eager to succeed but determined to do well. It’s a lovely thought that history might be repeating itself.
The Giver
The week before the derby, I was given some secret good news: colleagues were being given the opportunity to meet Jordan Pickford and I immediately thought about my kids and how the ‘keeper – and too few people use that apostrophe – has grown in stature in their lifetime.
I gave the two a couple of shirts to get signed, but didn’t expect anything in return. Not only were both of the red variety, but I didn’t think he’d have the time to sign anything, knowing how things have changed since when I had heroes and carrier bags full of ephemera for autographs.
Still they both admitted he was a ‘legend’ with kids and staff alike and I was elated to receive a bundle of joy the following morning which I knew my kids would be equally made up with (well, one, but the other will be, in time…)
Unfortunately, at the end of the game, someone made a mistake, meaning that some decided to direct messages and ‘banter’ at others whilst forgetting their own past comments and misdemeanours. Thankfully, said others rose above it; as Michelle Obama said, “they go low, you go high!”
Animal Farm
It’s funny how George Orwell is deemed as the most dystopian author of all time when arguably his best works are based on real-life experiences: Down and Out, Homage to Catalonia etc. However, we know, read and teach his imagined futures… which have eventually come true and the derby summarised all this quite neatly.
That given Sunday, I was at a playgroup party all afternoon which was a nice distraction but I really thought this was our chance, our time. The result wasn’t a surprise – they may well go on to win the league – but the manner of defeat was arguably the worst I’ve known in the thirty three years I’ve been a Blue, which is saying something given the myriad ways we have lost to them, especially in bizarre circumstances.
I realise that it’s probably going to be this way forever, and we might actually create history with our ever more elaborate ways of losing ridiculously against – what was on the day – largely at-best-equal and possibly inferior opposition.
Classless and undignified0o9, the lack of understanding of what happened, the ignorance of the bigger picture… all came through in the snippet of a broadcast I happened to see afterwards, and I felt a real sense of foreboding that a dystopia is coming after the utopia of the summer we experienced… by that, I mean the aftermath of the Champions League final.
(Oh, you know, when they all sent those death threats)
What’s funny is that football now seems to be seen by some as a game of one upmanship, but only by those people who have no direct experience of being a fan. It’s easy to show support online but quite pathetic to live one’s life by the successes of others and to only communicate with the world using the media of, say, Twitter, when you’ve never actually attended a game but prefer to enjoy victories through the goading of others. I actually feel really sad for those people, because their lives must be missing something… and not just the true experience of being a ‘proper’ fan, with everything good and bad that comes with it.
Indeed, the Friday before the match in question, we’d been to a great Courteeners gig, so the (wholly predictable) aftermath reminded me of the lyrics:
“I could not give one, ‘cos we are us not you.
You think you’re clued up, I think you’re glued up…
You’re the kings (and queens) of pretend.”
Mortal Engines
Many of us are parents, and some work in education, but the nervousness involved in a simple visit to your workplace by a few fellow grown-ups shouldn’t bring with it such pressures and pangs of worry but it does, and another positive of the year would have to be the increased focus nationally on mental health. Even my little girl has been going to mindfulness yoga classes, with clear benefits. Even a trip to Mary Poppins made me think about how bad moods, feeling low and negativity can affect family life.
The sad thing is that too many people don’t ask for help, and the year saw the sad departure from this planet of many people who just couldn’t cope any more. Most of them we may never know about, but one in particular upset me more because of a personal connection and influence I had felt since first reading this guy’s description of his first oyster in the seminal Kitchen Confidential back in 2006.
Let’s look out for each other a bit more in 2019. Don’t be alone.
Don’t, also be, inconsiderate and selfish… that’s what I’ll recommend my horrible neighbour has as her own resolution when she questions whether or not to park outside our house or to again ring the police over a sleeping child. It’s ok, because we use her as a deterrent and threat regarding bad behaviour, which works well given her general abhorrence and nearby location. But it’s not so nice to feel let down by people close to you who should know and do better, and this was a theme of the year, being disappointed by people and their actions; I won’t give specific examples, but they probably know who they are.
As an affront to this negativity, we had a wonderful time away with the extended family amidst a heat wave and a new part of the world that will forever be important to us. That more than made up for the rubbishy stuff.
FOR INFO:
A Clockwork Orange (1971) features one of the more uncomfortable scenes in cinema, when Alex (Malcolm McDowell) is submitted to the aversion therapy tactics of the fictional Ludovico Technique. In the film, a Dr. Brodsky (Carl Duering) of the Ludovico medical facility forces Alex to watch violent images for extended periods of time as his eyes are held open with specula. He’s pumped with nausea-, paralysis- and fear-inducing drugs at the same time, with the objective being the development of a nauseous association when experiencing or thinking about violence, causing an aversion. It’s essentially a mechanical, Pavlovian construct that associates stimuli with negative reinforcement instead of positive.
Some things I’ve already written about are just
like the scene in A Clockwork Orange
when Alex is given his Ludovico treatment; it always reminds me of getting
laser eye treatment some nine years ago: the intensity, the pain, the not being
able to look away…
Football often has the same impact, and I’m not talking about the perennial disappointment we experience at Goodison.
Let me explain…
I’ve had a soft spot for Napoli since Maradona’s time and in recent years, have grown to love them as the underdog of calcio and the country itself. I spent a day of my honeymoon touring the city (alone, my wife being too scared to join me) and now obsess over the literature of Roberto Saviano and the food and drink of the Campania region. The football team themselves embody the region and the busy nearby port with their work ethic, ethnic diversity and dogged determination to succeed, despite challenges: a bit like our own AZZURRI.
“I’m sorry for the loss, but especially for letting my brothers down. I’m proud of the color of my skin; to be French, Senegalese, Neapolitan, and a man”
So said Khalid Koulibaly, a recent victim of racism, who has previously explained his love of Naples and feeling a part of the city despite the extra problems he has faced in Serie A. The recent game against Inter, when he was sent off after having been subjected to abuse for most of the match, highlighted another problem in the sport we love to watch but – in doing so – regularly see the worst in people.
Thankfully, in their next game the Neapolitans wore masks of his face to show their support… but clearly, something has to change.
Children of Men
My little girl’s nativity – brought up to date, what with sat navs and flossing and inn-spectors – reflected modern life quite perfectly. She really was a super star!
I saw a few good shows this year: some of the Biennial, a very clever piece by Leo Fitzmaurice… and I end with the great John Lennon, with whom I really fell in love this year. Visiting a wonderful exhibition at the Museum of Liverpool (replacing my own installation) led me to re-watched documentaries, listening again to lyrics. I’d taken for granted our similarities in thoughts and idealism and art schools; I began to really appreciate more what he was going on about, and how close I’ve been to a lot of it. That came to pass when enjoying a catch up with a friend from twenty years ago, then at our eighth (count ‘em) wedding of the year a place I used to work at, and I realised that we should all give peace a chance in 2019.
Before we do, look back yourself… it has been a positive year, in many ways.
Let’s not forget that: but, whatever happens in the future, we must remember his words. It was great to see what happened in Liverpool over Christmas.
So this is Christmas and what have you done
Another year over, a new one just begun
And so this is Christmas, I hope you have fun
The near and the dear ones, the old and the young
A very merry Christmas and a happy new year
Let’s hope it’s a good one without any fears
And so this is Christmas for weak and for strong
The rich and the poor ones, the road is so long
And so happy Christmas for black and for white
For yellow and red ones let’s stop all the fights.
WAR IS OVER.
Peace in 2019… Choose Your Own Adventure.